Mr Stephensons Fucking Machine Part 1. "Mr Stephenson is here sir" Arthur Cleghorn was a self made man, a man of vision, a modern man, a man prepared to embrace modern technology to its fullest degree.
"Send him up Perkins" Arthur replaced the speaking tube on its whistle and paced up and down the Oak panelled reading room in the west wing of his as yet unfinished brand new mansion. "Mr Stephenson, Sir." "Ah Stephenson, good of you to come so quick, now this is ah delicate, a slight accident, mishap." "Begging pardon sir I'm buggered if I know what you are on about." "No I doubt a chap of your class would know, but, I better show you, now I hope you have a strong stomach because this is not for the faint of heart." Cleghorn led him down the long corridor, through the dressing room and into the bed chamber where a pair of bare legs and a mass of curly black pubic hair emerged from a blanket held aloft by Josie and Kelly the two serving maids.
"Eee bah gum, its Belgian in't it, what's up with it Mr Cleghorn sir." "So you know about fucking engines, Sid Longhurst said you knew all there was to know about fucking engines." "Well I never saw one in use so to speak but yes what is problem." "The ends busted off in Mrs Cleghorn you fool look." They looked at the area between the raised legs. Brass glistened faintly between slightly parted cunt lips. "Spread yourself, let the chap have a good look at thine unmentionables." "Thats as wide as they go" she wailed as the girls giggled.
"Josie, Kelly help her spread them cunt lips so as lad can see" "Can I put my fingers up and feel?" "If you must." "Oh pleeeasee." "Her don't need bloody pleasuring lad, we wants it out. I got better things to do with my time than pleasuring that lazy cow." "By heck Arthur you always did have a silver tongue" announced Mrs Cleghorn from behind her blanket. "You would rather pleasure a serving wench than pleasure me" she moaned.
"So I bought you the Fucking engine, keeps going all bloody day if you stoke it so what you complaining about?" "Bloody men" she moaned.
George examined the damage. "It's snapped off flush, operating rod has like, I reckon its threaded, can't she squeeze it out herself." "She been trying all morning." "In that case I will have to drill it and tap a thread then pull it out." "How much." "Two Shillings." "Two bloody shillings" "It's all I have on me." "All you have, ah I see bloody funny, I suppose having your hand up bosses wife's unmentionables with him watching is bloody funny, any road just get and do it lad." And so young George set to work drilling the broken brass rod with his hand drill, the work was tedious and Josie had to hold the brass egg still with her tiny hand deep inside Mrs Cleghorns cunt and the tiny flecks of brass had to be removed one by one as work progressed.
George worked methodically first a one eighth hole then a quarter he concentrated hard, finally he selected the drill to suit the new fine thread his friend Arthur Finstock had recently developed with twenty four threads for every inch.
"I'll tap it five sixteenths A F" he said. "This technology is all bollocks to me lad and they all peered intently at Mrs Cleghorn's crotch.
"Pity we culd not borrow Albert Kodak's Camera Obscurer and get picture." "Aye lad that would give lads a laff if it were printed in Pit magazine." "Don't you bloody dare Albert, thems my unmentionables and I decide who sees them, I don't want all the lads in pit looking at me, wanting to have a go at, you know" said Mrs Cleghorn dreamily.
"She is getting very moist again Mr Cleghorn." "Stop fantasising woman, yer getting all wet, how's lad supposed to work when yer cunts leaking like a busted boiler tube." George inserted the Threaded Tapping tool into the hole ands gently turned it, it started cutting then the whole egg turned. "Hold it firm lass, It's Josie in't it." "Yes Mr Stephenson." "See if you can reach round more like this." He touched her hand guiding her, realisation hit him like an electric shock, suddenly he realised what he was doing, holding hands with a beautiful girl while she had her hand inside another woman, his hand shook.
"Thee needs sommat done about that young George." "What is that sir." "Yer pricks about to burst open, you needs summat done about it afore you do some damage. Show him our patent Water Closet, Josie and sort him out." Josie took George by the hand and led him to the cubicle, he was unfamilliar with the technology, but Josie bolted the door and soon she had his breeches around his knees and was kissing the moist purple helmet of his manhood.
"This ain't right lass, I can't marry you if you get baby." he said. "I can't get a baby like this you have to do this." She guided his manhood between her cunt lips and sank down on him as he sat on the gleaming white porcelain. "To get a baby." A column of liquid erupted from his balls so hard he fully expected it to erupt from her mouth. "Oh Mr Stephenson, Oh my, you did not even want to see my little titties but you just took your pleasure." "I like you lass but I can't marry you." "And I don't want you to, this is 1808 not the dark ages, and anyway Mr Cleghorn has decided you will marry his eldest daughter Chastity" "No bugger tells me anything." "Are you ready for another go or shall we get on" she started to pull her rough blue knickers back on.
"I never done that before" "Really" "Yes, I always thought" "Well don't think, we have work to do." Arthur was eating a pork pie when they returned. "Best check for crumbs I had a close look when you was away." Josie once again inserted her whole hand in Mrs Cleghorn's cunt gripping the brass egg firmly as George gently moved the threading tool clockwise then back anticlockwise then clockwise once more creating the thread. Finally he announced it was done. George selected a rod with a threaded end and a T handle on the other end and screwed it carefully into the brass egg and pulled.
"Aaaagghh" Cried Mrs Cleghorn, "Its too big." "So how did you get it up there?" "Daniels the footman helped." "How?" Demanded Arthur. "He showed me his appendage." "Bloody Hell, show her your appendage then George while Josie and Kelly try pulling. George obeyed with some misgivings, After all Ada Cleghorn and his own dear dead departed mother had been friends and had worked on colliery screens together from leaving school at nine until they went into service at thirteen, Ada got pregnant by Boss and His mum by Jim Stephenson, Cage man at number three shaft at pit.
Jim died when he drank three gallons of what tasted like home made wine but was actually rocket fuel for Georges Rocket and his mum died of Clap through working nights in underground Brothel in Barnstoneworth Pit to pay for him to learn engineering at Mining Academy. "Eee lad its gorgeous, it reminds me of Arthur's when we first did it, you remember Arthur, I was walking through woods and you just swept me off me feet and shoved that monster in me." "Aye lass, and when I finished I said to bugger off and not tell anyone but you said you wanted it again." "You hardly had strength to walk home." "And you showed me mam where I bit yer neck, and all stuff running down yer legs and me mam, said I was to marry you because you would never need to waste brass on a whore if you wed someone that desperate for cock." "SSsslllopp" the brass egg slid out glistening with cunt juice.
"Oh, it do feel queer without nothing in after all this time" Ada announced. George struggled with his breeches, Josie appeared carrying the Chamber pot, she grasped his manhood firmly and after a few swift movements of her tiny hand a great arc of cum shot out which she deftly caught in the Pot.
"Thank you, stammered George, putting his now shrunken manhood away.
George turned his attention to the Belgian contraption. "Cuntraption Belgique pour les femme." he read "Made in England," "Its a poor imitation sir, poor quality, it would say made in Yorkshire or Newcastle if it were any good, look it just snapped off, metal fatigue, crystalline fracture, does it get much use?" The girls looked very sheepish.
"You girls been using it as well as the mistress then." They giggled, "Well Mr Stephenson, can you fix it." "I reckon so Mr Gleghorn, it needs a heavier connecting rod that's all with a swivel joint, I can have it running again by Thursday sir.
"Bloody hell, Thursday, poor bitch will be climbing the walls." "Or I can adapt one of mine sir." "What." "Portable pump sir, same thing almost, just needs an egg thing on a shaft on an eccentric." "It's all bollocks to me lad but do whatever is quickest and I'll pay, don't worry about brass. Now bugger off quick." "Can I borrow a Hand cart to carry it please Mr Cleghorn sir." "Take Bloody Coach and four it'll be quicker but be careful them's thoroughbred, they got a lot of power and bugger all sense, best get Coachman to drive thee." Stephenson left the room.
Ada rose from the bed and squatted over the Chamber pot. "Albert I needs a word with thee." "Yes dear." "That Stephenson.
"Yes." "I never seen a prick like that except yours, and the eyes, and way he stands, you could be brothers." "Ah." "Or father and son." "Yes, you know when you had scarlet fever." "Yes." "Well I had to fuck someone and well I knew when I saw kid growing up, I'm sorry lass." "Well, I might as well let on as our Chastity, Lord Fanshawe, well you know, you was up at Harrogate, I was lonely, you never wondered why she is like a swan and we are more like crows." "Well, don't matter now does it, we are settled and divorce is bad for trade." "Just as long as you get my machine repaired." Stephenson drove home in style and quickly with Cleghorn's Coachman's assistance loaded the engine in the carriage, next they loaded the seperate boiler and he got the Coachman to pump the bellows so soon the forge was glowing and he fashioned a new connecting rod and brazed the brass egg to it.
He reamered the holes to size and throwing more tools in the carriage soon they were back at Cleghorn Hall. They took it to the parts of the Machine to Ada's bedroom and set it up, the maid filled the boiler with warm water and brought live coals from the fireplace and soon the pressure gauge showed a 5pounds per square inch.
Arthur Cleghorn watched them work. "Ee lad that looks bloody tatty for a boudoir." "Sorry Mr Cleghorn, I could use Brass and copper but it all adds to cost." "Just paint it bloody pink then." "Who wants do volunteer for test?" he enquired.
Kelly, the senior chamber maid volunteered for the test, she eagerly slid out of her bloomers and lay down shuffling down until the brass egg nudged her Labia, George turned the wheel carefully and the egg disappeared inside just the shaft left exposed leading to the engine.
George carefully strapped her feet to the main frame and adjusted the length and stroke turning the mechanism by hand until he was satisfied, he was surprised that she needed the full six inches that the three inch setting for the crank throw gave but she still said more.
Josie stoked the boiler and waited for pressure to built and then as George spun the flywheel Josie turned the steam valve and the machine hissed into life the end of the piston emerging at the end of each back stroke. Hissssssh, Pock, Hisssss, Pock, Hisss, Pock, Hiss, Pock.
The flywheel whizzed round and the balls on the governor approached the balls out position, the exhaust bubbled through the feed water header tank and the little fire roared.
"How is that thats sixty cycles per minute." "Mmmm." "Is that enough." "Harder." "No can't do harder, faster or slower." "Oh." "More Coal lass pressure is dropping." "Keep one eye on water level, dont wan't it priming or dropping lead plug do us." Tears of joy streamed down Kelly's face. "Its much better than the other Oh." she announced.
"What." "Oh Mr Stephenson you are the best Oooohhh, " She lost her train of thought. "Looks like lass has had enough, for now so shut damper on fire and shut down steam." "By heck George, that's a wonderful machine you have there." "Thank you sir, I can paint it if you like or repair t'other one." "Yes do t'other as a spare." "Strapping girl on is bloody good idea." "Yes Sir, Belgian design can give side thrust and overload mechanism.
"Mr Stephenson, can I have a go next?" Josie enquired. "I think Mrs Cleghorn should try it next." "Yes, you can have a go after" Cleghorn reaffirmed. Ada came across and lay down, "This one had better not break." "Set her up Josie," ordered George. "Put egg thing against her cunt." "Like this?" "That's it, just up inside then turn wheel to ease it inside her." Ada's eyes widened.
"Are you alright Missus." "Yes MMmm" agreed Ada. " careful,turn flywheel slow to see if she takes lot, Thats it, its at top, now ease down missus." Ada shuffled shoving the egg ever further inside her. "Turn it some more and as long as it don't drop out again strap her feet to machine." Josie tightened the leather straps. "I done it" she announced, "Right a few more turns then open steam valve." Hissssssh, Pock, Hisssss, Pock, Hisss, Pock, Hiss, Pock.
"She's away, set speed lever for 60 and just keep an eye on coal and water." "Well lad lets leave girls to it and have a bite to eat," Arthur suggested, "thee best show Footman how to oil mechanism when them finished with it." They quietly left the room and walked the long corridors to the Kitchen. =================== To be continued